TECHNOLOGICALLY CHALLENGED/TECHNOLOGY ACCEPTANCE

I would like to start by saying I am technologically challenged. I know this, and I accept this. I know first hand how frustrating, nonsensical and infuriating technology can be because I work in online marketing, and have a laptop at home on a wireless network, with a wireless all-in-one printer, with iTunes, a digital camera, etc. that I set up all by myself. Over a week. Or two. There are some things in life that you simply need to accept to maintain your sanity. This is one of them. If you accept that no matter how "simple" the instructions claim it is, if only you "follow these three easy steps", that it is going to take you at least two hours of time investment for each "easy step", you will have conquered the first step to technology acceptance. (Subsequent steps involve restraining onself from strangling someone, and avoiding potential jail time, however I will not cover those here.)

What does this have to do with shopping, you ask? I am getting to that.

I decided that I would set up a wireless network at my parent's house because my father was incessantly nagging me while I work (either on school work or work work) to check his email. He is retired and mostly just forwards jokes, buys things on eBay, and other similar activities, so it's not like it's important stuff. But it is his house and his Internet connection, so my solution was a wireless network so we could all be online together as one happy family.

Here's the shopping part: I bought a wireless router.

I had already set one up at home, and it was, dare I say, pretty easy. Yeah...no such luck here. First I try to set it up by myself for a couple of hours following the "three easy steps" that made about as much sense as Sanskrit (that was Day 1). No dice. Day 2 I call Linksys. After an hour, Linksys tells me they have done all they can do and I need to call Verizon (oh yeah, my father has DSL - dramatically slower line - YUK!). So, I call Verizon. Now Verizon knows what model modem we have, the tech support person knows I am calling because I am trying to set up a Linksys wireless router, and we go through the motions. He promises that by the end of the call all my problems would be solved - no need for psychotherapy. Alas, an hour later it's kinda, sorta working. We hang up. Day 3 my father has to call Verizon for some issue, and I keep getting kicked off the wireless. He gets off the phone and says, "oh, by the way, you didn't need to buy a router because the modem is both a modem and a router". WHAAAAAA????!! Did I not speak to them just yesterday and they promised to solve all my problems? Again, no dice. I decide to take one last stab. I call Linksys. I threaten to return the router. He promises to solve all my problems, too. I tell him everyone is saying that to me and yet I still have problems. One hour later, I say thank you very much I am returning the router. I said more than that but we'll leave it there. He was a very nice guy, really. So I pack the router back up and call Verizon. Seriously, this is my last phone call. I could have raised a child and sent them off to college with all of the time and energy already invested in this.

Once again, the Verizon support person promises that all of my problems will be solved. I am not holding my breath. We go through a bunch of stuff, and about a half hour later it's a MIRACLE! It actually worked. My support person's supervisor wants to speak to me. OK, fine. (By the way, every single person I spoke to wanted to know how my Thanksgiving was (lovely, thank you, except for all this), how many people were coming, what did I make, which I find very nice considering they are all based in India where as you know they do not celebrate Thanksgiving). The supervisor wanted to make sure that I was happy and that all my problems were solved. Yes, I say, but why didn't the Verizon rep I spoke to yesterday not tell me that the modem was a router, too? Now that's a head scratcher. No explanation, however they are thrilled that all of my problems have been solved.

I am technologically challenged, and I have accepted that I will forever spend 1/4 of my life making my life's technology work.